this may be intended as humurous or it may be me just ranting.
So turned 30 back in June, no big deal at the time really. Fast forward a mere six months, left the farm in Arkansas and ended up in Arizona working construction / landscaping with all mexicans, where I speak spanish all day. Yes, Arizona, lots of cactuses and shit. Yes, t's beautiful out here, but my outlook has clouded my ability to absorb the wonder of it all.
Here I am, making 9 dollars an hour, getting extremely adept at insulting people in Spanish. For all that I feel I can do, all the potential and knowledge I've built up, I find myself in a world that could really give a fuck. Wow, your an expert at french intensive no-till organic farming, doesn't mean a fucking thing out in AZ.
Went to the club last night and for the first time really got hit with the "holy shit I am getting fucking old" feeling. Getting friendly with a 43 year old woman who looked like she was my age, and everyone else looked like high school kids. I remember going out at 21 and everyone looked so mature and older, and now it's totally switched. Some girl locked into my eyes and randomly said to me "oh ma god your like not even close to my age". And I'm a very young looking 30 year old! Like I could pass for 24-25 no problem.
I have no idea where I'm going. Just saving up money. May bolt for Europe. May try to move to SoCal. May go back to school for a degree at try to "settle down" which is like a dirty word in my mind.
Ahhhhhhh!!!!!! Father Time, chupa mi culo, cabron!
So turned 30 back in June, no big deal at the time really. Fast forward a mere six months, left the farm in Arkansas and ended up in Arizona working construction / landscaping with all mexicans, where I speak spanish all day. Yes, Arizona, lots of cactuses and shit. Yes, t's beautiful out here, but my outlook has clouded my ability to absorb the wonder of it all.
Here I am, making 9 dollars an hour, getting extremely adept at insulting people in Spanish. For all that I feel I can do, all the potential and knowledge I've built up, I find myself in a world that could really give a fuck. Wow, your an expert at french intensive no-till organic farming, doesn't mean a fucking thing out in AZ.
Went to the club last night and for the first time really got hit with the "holy shit I am getting fucking old" feeling. Getting friendly with a 43 year old woman who looked like she was my age, and everyone else looked like high school kids. I remember going out at 21 and everyone looked so mature and older, and now it's totally switched. Some girl locked into my eyes and randomly said to me "oh ma god your like not even close to my age". And I'm a very young looking 30 year old! Like I could pass for 24-25 no problem.
I have no idea where I'm going. Just saving up money. May bolt for Europe. May try to move to SoCal. May go back to school for a degree at try to "settle down" which is like a dirty word in my mind.
Ahhhhhhh!!!!!! Father Time, chupa mi culo, cabron!